But I Trust in Your Unfailing Love

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Psalms Chapter 13 has been on repeat this whole week. No matter what Psalm I read, I always read Chapter 13 this week. You go through days or moments when you are thinking.. “How long must I go through this, Lord? How long till you answer my prayer?? When will you change my heart and change my mind, when it comes to certain things??” Have you ever just said… “HELP ME.” or maybe “FIX ME.”..? So many times we seek answers now, and are in such desperation…where we are oh so desperate for God. Times where we feel as if we are failing, and losing. Sometimes it feels as if the enemy is winning his battle with our mind. Psalms 13 deals with all of the following feelings..

…And when it seems as if all victory is lost… Psalms 13:5 states: “But I trust in your unfailing love, my heart rejoices in your salvation”. It is okay to have feelings of uncertainty and brokenness..but it is important to remember that we have the blessedness of unfailing love. Unfailing love moves us to do anything for someone’s well being, and we have the opportunity to be loved by unfailing love. This is a call to rejoice. This is a celebration of salvation. Verse six states: “I will sing the Lords praise, for he has been good to me.”

Nothing too big to speak on today. Just a reminder if you are desperately waiting on God when it comes to anything, you wait on someone who has unfailing love towards you, and is working all things together for our good. Romans 8:28 states it (“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.“) So.. pray and praise through the pain. You are in the best hands you can be in. Although uncertainty deals with our emotions, we certainly serve an unfailing God. Rest in unfailing love.

Psalm 13
How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
    How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
    How long will my enemy triumph over me?

Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

But I trust in your unfailing love;
    my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing the Lord’s praise,
    for he has been good to me.

Love is perfect, We are not.

walking_alone1 Corinthians 13:4-8

New International Version (NIV)

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking,it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

Everyone who knows a thing or two has read this word and applied it to their personal life. Almost every girl whom knows of this verse, that I have known models this after their next relationship. When we finally get in a relationship..We aim to be patient and kind. We don’t try to envy. We try not to boast and be proud. We seek to honor and be selfless for the person, to not be self seeking. We aim to be patient with emotion, as we aim to not be easily angered. We try to forgive completely and not bring up wrongs. We try to not delight in what is bad, but rejoice in the truth. We aim to protect our loved one and trust, hope, and persevere through the relationship. I mean, why not? These verses are the best representation of a successful relationship that I can find in the bible. Does this not seem like a recipe for a successful relationship? Of course it is. In many occasions… people have said to remove love on the following verses and place your name. (Insert your name here) is patient, (Insert your name here) is kind. (Insert your name here) does not envy, (Insert your name here) does not boast, (Insert your name here) is not proud. 5 (Insert your name here) does not dishonor others, (Insert your name here) is not self-seeking, (Insert your name here) is not easily angered, (Insert your name here) keeps no record of wrongs. 6 (Insert your name here) does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 (Insert your name here) always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

There is only one problem, we are not….. love. We are human. We fail. Sometimes we are not patient. We are not kind. We envy. We are prideful and boast. We dishonor. We can be self-seeking. Sometimes, we anger easily. We fall short, and delight in evil. Sometimes we forget to rejoice in truth. We forget to protect. We forget to trust. We forget to hope, and we grow weary and fall short of perseverance.

But verse 8 says “Love never Fails.” Verse 8 talks about God’s works. It took a while to realize…the only one who never fails is God. God never fails. So…GOD is patient, GOD is kind. GOD does not envy, GOD does not boast, GOD is not proud. 5 GOD does not dishonor others, GOD is not self-seeking,GOD is not easily angered, GOD keeps no record of wrongs. 6 GOD does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 GOD always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. God is perfect. We are not. As much as we would love and aim to be as selfless and as great as he, we are not. We can only strive to be. When relationships strain and suffer, we must remember that we are not perfect, and we fail, but love never fails.

Oh, but do not get me wrong…Modeling a relationship after 1 Corinthians 13;4-8 is wise. Although we are not perfect. We strive to be the best versions of ourselves that we can be. We strive to be more like God. I used to disregard verse 8, now verse 8 to 13 is my favorite part.

1 Corinthians 13:8-13New International Version (NIV)

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Jubilant

Today is a good day. I woke up in peace. I woke up in victory. I read in a blog somewhere that if are in peace, you are in victory. I really need to get back on my A game. I have started dressing up a bit more and using more makeup, which automatically makes you feel better if you have a not so good day. I took biotin and calcium today. I’m glad I’m becoming active again. I really need to go to the gym very soon.

Anyway, today I have been reflecting on giving. I have been meditating on this for a few days now. I really want to focus on giving. My Ma always quoted Acts 20:35 when teaching us how to share … “35 In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.” 

Sharing is good. I’ve realized that Acts 20:35 speaks more on just sharing the material. Acts 20:35 states that you must give to those around you. You must give your time, your energy, your kindness. Momma always said “It is better to give than to receive.”

So don’t be discouraged if you give something and don’t receive the same thing you give back. Chances are you never will. On the bright side! The more you give the more of a reward in heaven you get. Don’t be discouraged. Move in faith, move in boldness, and move in victory!

Jerald update:
Jerry will have surgery on Monday. He has gone back home for the weekend and will sleep in his bed, also eat real food, for two days. I was stressing out about that and the fact that I hadn’t spoken to him all day so I called my Ma for words of encouragement. I’m so blessed and privileged to have such a strong prayer warrior and woman in faith as my Momma. She’ll set you straight and tell you what you need to hear. I’m so privledged.. Please keep Jerry’s surgery in your prayers.

Always,

Yanira

Hard day.

I feel so tired and drained. My legs feel like noodles. My legs feel bruised. Bruised noodles. I haven’t been able to speak to Jerald today. I really wish…

Jerald is staying in Seattle for a bit more. I guess they are looking into a surgery for his headaches, even though the tumor is inoperable.

I just…

I’ll trust you God.

Proverbs 3:5-6
New International Version (NIV)

5 )Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 )in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.[a]

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God, give me your heart

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Here is my cry.

I cry out to you God,  give my your heart. I want a heart for your people. I want a heart for the broken, the lost, the helpless, a heart for the world. I am pushing myself to be bold enough to ask you Jesus, for your heart. From the depths of my soul to the depths of your heart. In church we sing “Give us clean hands, give us pure hearts..” We cry out to you for creating a pure heart within us. (Psalms 51:10) …But I don’t want my fleshfull heart. I want your heart. “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is?” -(Jeremiah 17:9) I seek a heart that loves unconditionally, resiliently. I don’t seek to be run my emotions. I seek a heart like yours, Jesus. I want to love even those who push me away. I want to constantly cover those who turn away from me. As you did. As you died for those who did not know you. I want to have a heart for those who don’t know me. That is my cry this morning. That is my cry this year. I want your heart. Change me. Break me. Mold me. Make me yours. Break my heart for the things that break yours.

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